The fence and the nail - Motivational Story for Anger Management

Bismillaah

As Salaamu 'alaykum and Peace to all,

Recently i witnessed an incident of a man who lost his cool temporarily. The issue was quite simple, really. Given if he had just a tiny weeny little bit of patience, he could had gracefully solved the problem. I keep thinking to myself, why must we keep losing our temper. I know I had my own account of incidences too, fortunately, alhamdulillaah, when I get angry, i tend to walk away from the situation. To cool of. Not to run away. I would prefer to come back to the situation when things are calm. We think better when we are not under the 'influence' of Syaitan, right? Furthermore, I think I am more of a 'water' person than fire. So, that helps i guess.

Despite my 'temporarily walking away' method, I really want to know if there is a way to help control a person's anger. Or to make a person see how much damage he might accidently do by deciding not to exercise control over his anger. My curiousity was answered in this story...

This is a lovely story which would inspire and help you to deal with a person who has anger problem:

There was a boy who was always losing his temper. His father gave him a bag full of nails and said to him, “My son, I want you to hammer a nail into our garden fence every time you need to direct your anger against something and you lose your temper.”

So the son started to follow his father’s advice. On the first day he hammered in 37 nails, but getting the nails into the fence was not easy, so he started trying to control himself when he got angry. As the days went by, he was hammering in less nails, and within weeks he was able to control himself and was able to refrain from getting angry and from hammering nails. He came to his father and told him what he had achieved. His father was happy with his efforts and said to him: “But now, my son, you have to take out a nail for every day that you do not get angry.”

The son started to take out the nails for each day that he did not get angry, until there were no nails left in the fence.

He came to his father and told him what he had achieved. His father took him to the fence and said, “My son, you have done well, but look at these holes in the fence. This fence will never be the same again.” Then he added: “When you say things in a state of anger, they leave marks like these holes on the hearts of others. You can stab a person and withdraw the knife but it doesn’t matter how many times you say ‘I’m sorry,’ because the wound will remain.

“Show forgiveness, enjoin what is good, and turn away from the foolish (i.e., don’t punish them).”[al-A’raaf 7:199]

“Verily, he who fears Allaah with obedience to Him (by abstaining from sins and evil deeds, and by performing righteous good deeds), and is patient, then surely, Allaah makes not the reward of the Muhsinoon (good‑doers) to be lost” [Yoosuf 12:90]

“The good deed and the evil deed cannot be equal. Repel (the evil) with one which is better (i.e. Allaah orders the faithful believers to be patient at the time of anger, and to excuse those who treat them badly) then verily he, between whom and you there was enmity, (will become) as though he was a close friend” [Fussilat 41:34]

“And verily, whosoever shows patience and forgives, that would truly be from the things recommended by Allaah” [al-Shoora 42:34]

Deep, dont you think? After this story, I keep asking myself. Have i made any holes in the hearts of people around me? Astaghfirullaah.

Copyright (c) Sis Zabrina 2006
~ Your Source for Islamic Motivational and Inspirational Stories ~

Sis Zabrina
Life Storyteller
Author of Life is an Open Secret - 18 Inspirational Stories from Ordinary life experiences

~ Life Storyteller Blog: Your Source for Islamic Motivational and Inspirational Stories~

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